Tuesday's Best 12-14-2010

Good morning, my lovelies. Hope today finds you in good health and even better spirits. It seems like the Captain and Aradi've been busy... Let's see what they've got for you this week, shall we? Don't forget to grab a towel and a change of panties before you go ;-)

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Is it strange that I joke far too much yet love to read the angstyfail stories?

Probably.  Whatever.

Someone out there has to be like me.  We can suffer together, fanning each other and sharing the box of tissues, soothing our woe with a little unf.

Today’s example of “dark and slash and dank” (the author’s words) is Incarcerated by Goldenmeadow.  This is a short Edward/Jasper ficlet in Goldenmeadow’s distinctive style.  The cherry on top of my dark/slash sundae is that it is AU.  The story begins with the arrival of Alice and Jasper, and Edward’s immediate attraction to half of the couple.

Learning, quickly, that Jasper could sense and warp the sentiments of others, I was bound and gagged and gagging by the idea that he had known straight away of my lust for him. Stripped down to a pyre of pure need, my keen, keening, corrupt want was plain to him.

Never disgracing me, never shaming me, not once causing me to feel foolish for my misplaced affections, Jasper was humble. The picture of a gentleman that shouldered a world of sensation capable of felling a lesser man.

But I didn't know what he was really thinking.

I wanted to be inside him, be inside of him. Be.

I had no idea what he was thinking.

This is what I mean by Goldenmeadow’s style.  It’s like reading poetry, which I usually hate.  (Perhaps I’d like poetry more if it contained more slash?  Hmm.)  This isn’t the kind of story you skim just to get to the happy fun times.  That will only make you trip over the wordplay.

So Edward wants Jasper.  Alice has Jasper.  The Volturi want... what the Volturi always want.  I won’t spoil endings, but this story comes with clear warnings not to expect a fluffstorm.  I loveloveloved the ending, which should be warning enough in itself.

Incarcerated is long-completed and only four chapters.  Curl up with an angst-loving friend, an adult beverage, and a thesaurus and try it for yourself.

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*eyes Nae* Don’t give me that look, Missy. I am sorry but it had to be done, now sit still and let me shower you with praises.

Hello my slashtastics...I bet you are wondering what crazy juice Captain Jezebel  has been drinking ( rum....the Cap’n always drinks rum ). Anyway that is besides the point; I know you guys just want to know why Nae is giving me the evil eye; the answer...two descriptive words that when put together evoke such delicious sexiness. I am of course talking about Red Velvet, Naelany's gift drabbles for Ahizelm’s birthday, and what a lucky birthday girl you are, Ang.

Red like fire, hot, fuck that...smoking hot, that is the heat at which these drabbles burn. Seriously they are enough to make you fan yourself throughout, and perhaps need some water. Fast paced and extremely sexy.

Velvety smooth, the connection between her Edward and Jasper, perfectly effortless. Nae has the knack for bringing us a pair of boys that we can definitely see the bond between. No matter how long or short of time they know one another.

Put them together and you have Red Velvet, which happens to be Edward’s radio DJ handle to compliment the rhythmic, sensual tones in his voice that earn him a following of lustful fans. Unfortunately for Edward most of his fans have been of the female persuasion, which isn’t exactly his flavor. This is until Jasper drops by the studio to visit his buddy Emmett, and also hoping to meet the DJ that keeps him up all night.

Reluctantly letting go of his hand, I smirk, automatically using my radio voice. "The pleasure's mine, I'm sure."

My grin widens in satisfaction as Jasper bites his lip, shifting slightly, a faint blush on his cheeks.

I wouldn't mind him throwing himself at me. Jesus...

Emmett puts a hand on each of our shoulders, eyeing us wickedly - knowingly. "So I was supposed to show Jazz around the station, but I think that job'll suit you better, Red. Whaddaya say?"

Hell. Fuck. Yes. I'll show him around, alright.

"I think that could be arranged."

My eyes linger on Jazz's eager gaze.

Does Edward give Jasper a tour of the studio and more? Does the tour involve a lap dance and scented body oils? Are piercings involved? Or do they perhaps get to know each other over bologna sandwiches? *shrugs* there is only one way to find out....read the drabbles dang it. I can guarantee you will love Radioward and his #1 fan, Jasper. If that isn’t enough to get you reading ‘Zipper’, ‘Gasp’ and ‘Succulent’ are just three of the yummy prompts she uses in this set of drabbles.

So give em a looksee and leave Nae some lovin if you to...*eyes Nae again*. Good girl...you sat still and took those complimentary words like a champ. *winks, and kisses cheek*

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There you have it, folks. I  will admit that it's a little strange to know that these wonderful ladies had a round of fisticuffs over lil' ol' me, and I want to thank them for being so sweet. 

Be sure to leave some love, and check back next week to see what Stolenxsanity and I have in store for you.